I recently heard an interview with Daniel Lubetzky, a social entrepreneur and the the founder of KIND Snacks. Daniel said something very simple, yet quite profound:
"The way you behave... everyday... is who you are."
Key to his message was that you don't get to pick and choose when you treat people right. Either you're good ALL THE TIME or you're not.
I've also been catching up on the NFL's Hard Knocks and ironically coming to enjoy (and almost like) the Detroit Lions, a team I've rooted against for most of my life (because I'm a Vikings fan). On top of that, I've recently read that Lions' Head Coach Dan Campbell is one of the Vegas odds favourites to win this season's NFL Coach of the Year award. Last season, Campbell's first as a true NFL Head Coach, his team won only 3 of 17 games. So why do people think he might be worthy of such a lofty accolade? Because how he behaves... everyday... is who he is.
Now, time will tell if the Hard Knocks edit is an accurate reflection of the man that is Dan, but it certainly says something about the value of treating people right. Hard Knocks shows us a man with energy and intensity. He's a man who doesn't stand for half-assed effort and he'll be the first to get in a slacker's face, but he also has compassion and a sense of humour, and he's willing to get down and dirty with the team.
In a nutshell, Dan Campbell treats people right... everyday, and that has odd-makers thinking that he's destined for success. His consistent quality behaviour toward staff and players at all levels has people thinking that Dan Campbell is a quality individual, and that's an essential ingredient for successful leadership.
Successful leadership, now that's novel concept. Most of us are familiar with the (supposed) business leader (colleague, boss, or higher) who is all joy and flowers to his/her superiors and top salespeople but a pure jerk to the underlings. I've received both kinds of treatment and my primary takeaway is simple. If you're going to be a jerk to others, you might as well be a jerk to me... because I view you as a jerk. That's the way you behave. That's who you are
Wait a minute. You might now be thinking that this is in direct contrast to my recent piece where I suggest that before we judge, we take a minute to find out WHY people think and say what they do. I don't think this jars at all. I actually think the two dovetail nicely. While I may aim to learn why someone is a jerk, and I may feel some level of sympathy toward them for what they've experienced, it doesn't change my view that they are a jerk. There may be a reason or experience that negatively shaped your behaviour, but how you behave is still who you are. Capiche?
I think it's also important to remember that this 'what you do is who you are' concept doesn't just apply to big-time leaders in sports and business. It's perhaps even more relevant and important for the rest of us mortals in our everyday lives. Whether we're a parent or a sibling or a friend or a customer or a neighbour, how we behave is who we are. How do we treat our food servers, our grocery clerks, our taxi drivers, our fellow dog walkers, our anonymous Twitter followers or all those bad drivers? We're not all Head Coach of an NFL team or CEO of a major snack brand, but we're all establishing who we are with our behaviour... everyday.
Daniel Lubetzky made me think... and his brief comments made me want to be a bit better. He also made me hungry.
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